13.4.05

Beyond Plinth Hole!!

Welcome to the world of lost love. A territory that is marked with disgust, guilty feeling, solitude and misery. I hate to admit it but I jus had a relationship break up and I have been going through what every goddamn soul has gone through in their break ups. A sense of solidarity and low self esteem clouds and stands as a barrier between your perpetual self and the outside world. I must say that I had rather an interesting time over the past few months, with all kinds of thoughts creeping in and out of me constantly and felt that I am beginning to lose myself to acute depression. But luckily for me I had the will and support of my peers, family and mainly my elder brother (hereafter referred as big bro) who also went through a similar phase! I had so much to learn from him and he was very protective and concerned about how I got through it. I wow him a big thanks for reintroducing me to my art. He told me that the best way to rediscover one’s self is to challenge the self with something one is good at!! It never struck me until I actually found myself lost in the enormity of what my art had to offer. I was not a pro artist, but whatever I begin to create gave me a new meaning altogether and I rediscovered myself. During my lazy weekends at home I engaged myself hours together to draw and create what I always loved to do; aliens and robots!!

My work kept me engaged for eight hours a day and nothing could be more distracting than that. After my days work I had to come home and cook for my supper (no not the last supper!!) My roomies were always particular about my cooking. If there was a day when I had to cook, they try and finish off their dinner in some hotel or fast food joint!! Or best they would even go hungry!.

If you ask me there is nothing that could beat authentic home cooked food! Having said that to myself every day and mustering a great deal of courage I start to venture into cooking. I slowly started liking the process which to me is no different than doing an art. While cooking one has to be generous, free of inhibitions and not necessarily a “know how” in cooking!!

After an impromptu cooking session and an unfortunate eating ceremony in front of the prime times, off I go to sleep. Before that I make sure I feel thankful to the god for having given me such an interesting twists and turns in life and about all the situations I often get into and how I come through it only to remember that…

“When everything has been going wrong…Remember!! that it could have been worse!!”

2 Comments:

Blogger Φ said...

Very well said about the last statement..it could be worse. Many fail to realise that life is nothing but a fractal molecule conjoined with array of others in this never ending space and abysmal time. Life will never adhere to the steady state theory. There is constant contraction and stretch happening, we get crushed in or we ease out ..and every time we experience a change of state we are both influenced and influence. Those totaly detached from the system are the ones like saints & seers. There is no perfect oracle who can predict the outcome of life, even if he does he is always minutes late..whatever nomenclature it goes by, KARMA or FATE, to a realist its nothing but a triggered event that has roots somewhere and destinied to end elsewhere. Well we won be wise because we know all this, we won crib because it happened..may be we are hedonistic, heck who cares..!!

8:43 PM  
Blogger vidhu said...

well i thot i asked you to leave your comments...not something that would leave me wondering how different we both see our worlds and how beautiful you have understood them...an Hi Fy for ur comments

9:40 AM  

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